Bringing home babies......

The twins are three weeks old today. I can't believe it's been that long already. We've had many visitors and wonderful meals brought over. Between those and the freezer meals my mom prepared for us a few weeks before I delivered I haven't had to really cook dinner yet. To the many friends that brought us dinner-THANK YOU, that was such a blessing to our family.

The twins are still sleeping a lot so it's been pretty manageable so far. The only thing I haven't been able to do yet is venture out for errands with ALL the kids by myself. I've taken the twins and left the big kids and I've taken all four of them to run errands with help-but I've yet to head out alone with all of them except for walks and the park.  

It's been pretty funny to have people say they don't know how I do it. They see me out walking with my four kids.....one on a bike or scooter

one in a carrier

**I do not actually look this good-this is some miracle camera angle-it's like the power of Instagram, everything looks better

and two in the stroller.........

They just can't imagine it........but it's like Chrissy says here, "...you just do it because sometimes you just have to do what other people have no idea how you do because you just have no choice..." That's me. I'm just doing what I have to do and I don't even realize what I'm doing. My sister stopped by the other day and I was feeding the twins and helping Gage get ready for school. She said, "This is hilarious right now......you are nursing two babies at once and at the same time helping another brush his teeth." I wasn't really thinking about what I was doing-but when she pointed it out........I realized it was kind of crazy.  

But lets be honest-no one does it all. It's 1:15 and I'm still in my pajamas today....haven't even brushed my teeth yet. There is a basket of unfolded laundry that I've been eyeing all morning but have yet to get to. Gage's lunch was hurried because we were busy working on homework and in his rush out for school his dirty dishes were left-and are still on the kitchen table. Gracie's high chair is full of rice and broccoli from her lunch. She has been naked since I changed her diaper before breakfast this morning. There are toys ALL over the living room floor. Our beds aren't made. The counter is littered with thank you cards that I've started-but yet to finish and get in the mail. Must be a growth spurt because I feel like I've done nothing but feed the babies all day and they're still not all that happy. 

_________________________________________________________________________

That was all written yesterday......I didn't get to finish but now I will......

The hard parts are probably not what you would think. For one, I have help. I have a fabulous girl that comes and helps me run errands, make lunches, entertain the big kids, or whatever else I might need. The last few weeks of the pregnancy she came to watch the kids for my frequent appointments and would take the kids out to the park for me since I just didn't have the energy. I didn't want them cooped up in the house just because I was. She does the same thing now-she takes the kids to the park for me when I have to focus on the twins. She's here to help but it's hard for me........it makes me miss the big kids.

Gracie is still just a baby......

And when someone else prepares her lunch, takes her to the park, or lays her down for her nap-I don't like it. I miss her and I feel like someone else is being her mom.  

So then I take them to the park by myself-because I want to be with them. Then Gracie climbs by herself up to the big slide (where she is NOT big enough to go alone) and I realize why I need help. I can only do so much while carrying a tiny baby on my chest. 

Another hard part......when I got pregnant I never thought it would be my last pregnancy, or last baby....until we learned there were two. Some will find this CRAZY but when I snuggle my tiny babies I'm sad that I have to split my attention. It almost makes me want one more......one that gets to be THE tiny baby. Some mamas don't love the tiny baby phase-I do.....so I wish I didn't have to split time between my two. 

Gage has been a great big brother. He asks to hold them every day (Jay more often than Ashlyn) and tries to comfort them by giving them pacifiers or singing lullabies when they cry. He keeps Gracie entertained and helps with grabbing a clean diaper, tossing a dirty, or anything else they might need.  

He loves doing this-he turns laundry baskets into recliners. Gracie loves it.

 

The babies are growing like weeds......

Resting with brother....

 Blowing bubbles......

Napping after dinner.....

I spend a lot of time holding them together like this.....

but I don't really look that good-it's the angle and poor lighting. I WISH my hair was that color-but I'm actually in desperate need of an appointment with Carrie. 

I still can't believe I have four kids.....and that I'm a mother of twins. At the same time, I can't imagine life without them-they are my most precious treasures. My mom asked me how I was feeling........and I replied, "I feel like I've got this". She said that after coming by earlier this week, Amy described me as happy........I am.

Love