Circle K & Costco All Before Lunch

This morning Lauren invited us out to Circle K Ranch to snap some pics and visit the store. The kids had a great time throwing leaves and picking out chocolate covered everything from the store. Plus they love Harrison and they REALLY love Auntie Lo-Lo.

After running around in the orchards and the store we got in the car to head home. Gracie asked where we were headed. When I said  we were headed home she reminded me we had to go to Costco. Oh man, we did need to go to Costco. Ugh. It was crazy packed. The kids were really good for a while but the last of it was brutal. Jay broke the strap on the cart then kept trying to climb out. My cart was overflowing because I needed everything. I had given them trail mix in their snack cups and Jay looked like he had melted every color of M&M across his face. Upon checking out we noticed the sourdough bread package was cut open so the checker sent someone to get another.

At this point Jay is trying to climb out of the cart (successfully as he broke the buckle), Ashlyn is dumping what's left of her snack cup all over the floor, and I've only got one free hand as I'm trying to pay with the other. I'm having Gracie just hold my leg so I know she's there with me. I decide to just hold Jay so he doesn't fall out of the cart. He is flailing trying to get down and kicks Gracie in the head and she starts whining. Now I'm sweating. So I pay, give the receipt to Gracie because she loves to get the happy face and I step around the other side to my cart. I'm holding Jay while he's literally kicking and screaming and I'm trying to get my purse off my shoulder and into the cart so I can get a better hold on him. The lady that loaded my cart says, "You need to step out of the way and wait against the wall while he gets your bread." I almost lost it. My face read, "I hate you" and my brain said, "Are you &*%# ing stupid? Can you not see I'm struggling here?" The elderly couple behind me offered to help me. Good thing they stepped in with their kindness to save me from getting ugly. I really didn't need help-but I did need a second.

So the lesson here is don't be stupid like the cart loader at Costco. Right mom? And save your next Costco trip till after Thanksgiving.

Anyway, here are some of the great pics I got from Circle K Ranch this morning.

 I bought this dress on Zulily. Hand wash only. Who manufactures hand wash only for a 3-year-old? And who keeps it? Me.

 Who doesn't love a little guy in a pearl snap shirt?

 Sweet sisters

 He thought this was so funny

 Gracie's little grin is the best

 He would have wandered the whole ranch had I let him....

 This is so Ash to me

 Wait for it......wait for it.......

 Yay!!!

If I don't get back before the holiday-Happy Thanksgiving! We all have so much to be grateful for.

Love.

Like Weeds

I spend most my days with these three little loves.

They are hilarious and growing like weeds. Jay and Ashlyn have started to take notice of one another in a new way over the last several weeks. If I get milk for one then they stand and wait saying, "Sissy cup" or "Jay cup" waiting to get a cup for the other. They also started napping in separate rooms so the first thing they ask for when they wake up is the other. It also means that they've started to tattle. When one takes a toy away they come crying and pointing to me, "Sissy truck" or "Jay book" letting me know what has happened. Gracie's been starting to say really hilarious things too. Today she was complaining about her puzzle, "This is a tricky one". Or as I shared on Facebook, "That disgusting smell is mom's soup". They are growing like crazy.

You might forget that I've got this guy too.

This one. This one reminds me that these are the years......

Lately it's really been on my mind how important these school-age years really are. A few weekends ago Gage had a soccer game that I planned to go to but the weather had turned and I didn't want the little ones out in the cold. Long story short, Gage's dad couldn't take him. Matt was out of town so I had to take Gage and the three little ones to the game by myself when I was not prepared. I'll spare you the many reasons that morning was the pits. We showed up. He played. And we drove through Starbucks for a warm drink and coffee cake on the way home.

In the big picture was it really that important for him to make the game? No. But I wanted him to know that if he's going to play-he needs to be there. 

Because these are the years. This is when he'll learn that we often have to do things we don't want to do. That's not just something that happens here at home. It's time for him to learn that he'll play on teams that are terrible-that doesn't mean he can quit or miss games. He'll have friends that get him into trouble-that doesn't mean he can pass the blame. He'll have schoolwork that challenges him-that will mean giving up something fun to make it a priority. It's all part of being a good person. Teaching those lessons is easier said than done. Wish me luck!

On another note it's that time of year to think about what we have to be thankful for.....

Last week I went to drop Gage at soccer practice. It was close to 5pm. The kids from Campus Club were out playing basketball. Something hit me when I saw them. I realized that while I had already been filled in on the day, these parents hadn't seen their kids yet. I already knew that Gage did terribly on his spelling pre-test. We went over some ways for him to remember the correct spelling. I had already helped him make an apple with peanut butter for a snack and taught him how to slice an apple without getting hurt. I had already listened to his guitar lesson as he passed a few more exercises and learned to tune it himself. It was in that moment of seeing those kids that I realized the value of staying home, even as the parent of a school-age child. It's easy to explain why I stay home with our little ones, but this was the first time I really saw how it's valuable to Gage too. Please do not read this as judgement toward working parents, a necessity for every parent/child relationship, or as though I'm saying a working parent is not "there" for their children. It is just that for MY family, where our evenings are VERY full-I'm happy to have those after school hours as time to be with, teach, and just talk to Gage.  

I wish I could say that I'll be back to blog again soon, but I probably won't. So here's a billion pics of the kids since I've been lagging on writing. Enjoy.

He's still drooling, can you spot it?

I wish I had more patience to push her. She would swing for hours.

This is my most challenging child to photograph. The blond hair, the fair skin, the faces-it's too much for me.

 

Seriously. How do you photograph a child when their hair glows? 

But she has got the cutest little profile ever.

This guy is all boy.

The entire time we were at the Discovery Center she wanted to be in the kitchen/grocery area. Mama's girl.

Her face. Seriously. I thought Gage was expressive, this one takes the cake.

He's handsome.

I love her. Even with her messy hair she's perfect to me.

This is Jay's "sissy" face. This is what he looks like when he's complaining about one of the girls.

Barefoot at the park. Always. Even now that it's cold she always takes them off.

Her curls are starting to straighten out and I'm heartbroken.

His are staying strong.

Gage is growing up. Suddenly being tough is important.

Intense. Football against yourself is very serious business.

Man I wonder if I could still get my leg that high.

He loves teaching her things.

And Jay loves cookies. With frosting.

Ash likes hers without. 

This one just made me laugh.

Jay as Olaf

Gage as a football player

Attempted group shot

Gracie as a brunette Elsa. She refused the wig I bought.

Sisters.

Ashlyn as a blond Anna. She also refused with wig.

Brothers.

Pumpkin carving at Grandma Stacey's. This was the first year he was patient and focused enough to complete his own pumpkin.

Cousins.

Baking with mama. You need a big white cup of tea for baking.

This went surprisingly well. Bring on Christmas!

Hands down the most independent child of mine. Me buckle. Me do it. No help. Me do it.

Couldn't even get one to look.

Until next time!

Love.

Fruit, Flowers, and a Love Fern

Matt and I celebrated our fourth anniversary a few weeks ago. I didn't get a chance to blog about it then, but I'm making time now.

Since we follow the traditional gifts, our choice this year was fruit or flowers. It happened to work out for us because building the house has got us on a fruit or flowers kind of budget. The only trouble was that I like to get something that we can keep forever. So I gave Matty a bottle of wine (fruit) from the year we were married and I had the kids make a painting with their hands (a tree, which is close enough to flowers) that could be kept to remember this year. Matt gave me a bottle of wine as well, along with a love fern. Okay, it's not a love fern, it's a rose bush that we can keep in a container and then take to the new house with us. We spent our actual anniversary evening enjoying happy hour at Ruth's Chris. The following weekend we went to School House out in Reedley for dinner to celebrate. It was somewhere we've never been and just getting out of the same old same can be so special.

When I think about my marriage I feel peaceful and secure. I feel grateful and certain. I feel safe and loved. I feel blessed. There was a time in my life when I felt shameful and saddened by the fact that I had a failed marriage. The marriage I live now assures me that hearts can be restored and that I can feel well with my soul.  

A few weeks ago I attended the bridal shower of my cousin's fiance. For some reason as we were cleaning up after the shower she mentioned that Justin would not pick up tampons for her from the store. I laughed. "Have that first baby," I said, "things will change."

When I met Matt I was 28, a single mom, and probably in the best shape of my life. Then I got pregnant with Gracie right after we got married. And then I got pregnant with the twins. Now the skin on my stomach sags and makes my belly button look like a frown. It's never going back. My back and hips aren't right so I can't work out in the same way. Plus, you know, I can't always make the gym. If I laugh or sneeze unexpectedly I pee little bit....in my pants. I'm NOT the same person he married. But he loves this version of me too. He still makes me feel beautiful every day. Sure, he'd probably love if I was able to stay up past 9pm. At the same time he knows that tending to our children is exhausting and he admires the way I get it done. I'm sure he'd think it was amazing if I was back in the best shape ever. But he knows that my sagging skin was part of making those beautiful babies we adore. He makes me feel like it's fine when I have to order a pizza for dinner because I couldn't bring myself to take all the kids to the grocery store. He does the same when I fall asleep within thirty minutes of putting the kids to bed.

Matt has been gone for a week so far on a 10-day hunting trip with his dad and brothers. In some ways, if I'm honest, it's nice. I don't make dinner. The kids and I eat sandwiches, cereal, or whatever else I can scrounge up. I don't sleep well when he's away so I can stay up late and sew. I would usually look forward to watching trash TV, but I just haven't been able to get into anything anymore. Where's my RHOBH?

This morning Matt called and had to let me in on his surprise to come home a few days earlier than planned. I am SO excited. Like butterflies in my stomach excited. There's another element of joy to my day knowing that he's coming home early. Tomorrow we get to go to my cousins wedding together. He'll be there to see Gracie as a flower girl. We'll witness my brother officiate the wedding, just as he did ours. We'll have dinner, drinks, and dancing with some of our favorite people. There's something about being at a wedding together that is so special.

Our fourth year of marriage was filled with dirty diapers and messes. It was a year of wiping bottoms and getting by. These times aren't glamorous. We're not off traveling the world; we're lucky to get to Grandma's house. We're not living in a gorgeous home or enjoying fabulous gourmet meals. But these times are so precious. Right now I'm at the kitchen counter. Gage is probably taking his spelling test at school. Jay is trying to climb on the counter for the millionth time. Gracie is building a pillow fort. Ashlyn is putting on a fifteenth pair of shoes for the day. I lied, she's now pulling out what appears to be the 800th Ziploc bag and throwing it on the kitchen floor. And my husband, he is packing up to come home. And I can't wait, because life is just better when he's here.

Love.